Wednesday, October 13, 2010

You Know You're On a Diet If...

1. Packs of sandwich crackers taste like ambrosia (totally addicted to these things)
2. It's torture shopping where all the Halloween candy is sold, it makes you feel like a hungry street urchin in a Charles Dickens novel
3. You wolf down your veggies just to get them over with, so you can savor the main dish and have it be the last taste that lingers in your mouth (guilty)
4. You consider going to the gym for the third time, just so you can justify eating a tub of Ben & Jerry's
5. Just the thought of going to the gym for the third time makes you want to eat a tub of Ben & Jerry's
6. You know how many calories are in a tub of Ben & Jerry's and it makes you want to cry, but you still eat it while you are crying
7. You make two different dinners, one for you and one for the rest of the family
8. You fantasize about the bakery down the street, NOT the hot guy you see every day at the gym
9. You have a "goal" outfit in your closet (or you have 10, one for each diet you've been on)
10. You feel obligated to make guilty confessions on the HWHL blog when you fall off the wagon!

Throw in your own!

(P.S. Sorry, I'm not too witty at 10:30 pm, but I thought we needed a totally easy post, so we've all got something to comment on!)

How Much Halloween Candy Can You Get In a Pillowcase? - a humorous blog post I stumbled across. Obviously, this guy has never been to Utah, where you can crash several trunk-or-treats in church parking lots, or if they are crowded enough, you can wander through the same one three or four times.

7 comments:

  1. I'm not saying I'm lucky, but it does help that most halloween candy (including the candy corn & little pumpkins) makes my teeth hurt...and that's enough to stop me.

    Going to the gym 3 times in one day? I say one time should do it.

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  2. Becky, you crack me up! I love this list. Thanks for the laugh.

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  3. That big old bag of sugary loot looks like the bag I bought for H-ween with 150 pieces in it. Halloween is 17 days away and the bag now only has about 100 pieces of candy in it. Unlike my Apis, I can eat candy and unfortunately I do.

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  4. Becky,
    Only one of my kids was born with a totally flawless figure and a metabolism that lets her eat till most of us would explode. That would be Tobi. Yes, size 4 Tobi. The rest of us would not know what to do with a size 4 and haven't fit into it since Junior High School. It is natural to strive for perfection and I applaude your efforts. I think the makers of Ben and Jerrys are out to get us all! Keep trying, you'll have that outfit on in no time.

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  5. Becky, I love your true confessions. It's good to get them out and move on....and make the rest of us smile and laugh at the same time. Sorry I've left you hanging this week. I'm pulling up the boot straps, hosing off the muck and moving on.

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  6. Man, you guys should not take me so seriously! I really am not poised with a knife over my wrists or anything all the time (you should know that I'm giggling as I'm writing this!) This post was definitely tongue-in-cheek, and some of the things on my list were only hypothetical humor. You're supposed to be joining me in my humor, and adding silly things to my silly list!

    About going to the gym three times in one day - I don't think I've done that yet, but when I wrote my list late last night, I had already exercised twice, and was still feeling very snacky but didn't have a lot of calories left to spend, so that's where the 3-times-to-the-gym thought came from.

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  7. That's funny! I got a really good price on halloween candy, and made my husband hide them from. Worked great!

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